Monday, August 23, 2004
In the News: The Malaysian Human Rights Commission, encouraged by several advocacy groups, has recommended to the government that marital rape be categorized as a crime punishable under the Penal Code. It is not currently recognized as an offense at all. Indeed, at least one mufti (Islamic religious leader) has said that it is not possible for a husband to rape his wife.
Perak state mufti Harussani Zakaria said, "A husband has the right to be intimate with his wife and the wife must obey. If the wife refuses, then the rule of 'nusyuz' (disobedient) applies and the husband is not required to provide financial assistance to her." [quotes courtesy of Malaysiakini.com]
Others have said that Muslim women are only allowed to refuse sex if their husbands have STDs, HIV/AIDS, or if she is menstruating. Women's rights group--including Muslim women--have spoken out against this (reminding me of something mentioned in the headscarf article I wrote--below--that historically men have been the ones interpreting the religion...)
Women's Aid Organization has put forth the figure that 10% of the 700 domestic violence cases they have seen involve cases of marital rape. Of course there are many more that go unreported. Further statistics show that 80% of rapists (in general) are known to the victims and 30% are blood relatives of victims.
The number of reported rape cases in 1998 was just over 1,400, but it is estimated that for every one rape reported, nine are not. I've been very shocked at the number of cases of rape, incest, and murders following rapes (often of young children), covered by the paper. I've heard some non-Malays state the claim that sexual repression within Islam is to blame, but that fails to acknowledge the fact that the Malays are not the only perpetrators of these crimes, nor the fact that rape is usually not about satisfying sexual desire.
A Malaysiakini.com reporter wrote that, "It would not be an exaggeration to conclude that rape has reached epidemic proportions in Malaysia."
There must be understanding that rape is sex without consent, regardless of if it happens within a marriage. At least this public debate is bringing the topic to the table and organizations lobbying for the marital rape change also recognize that education and public awareness are an important component to solving the problem. The downside is that often Malays will not question the decisions put forth by muftis, but accept it blindly (even though not all muftis agree on everything...). [More on that soon.]
This and That
- My African friends at the Islamic University wanted to know why Americans always carry backpacks around: What do they keep in there?, they wondered. And why don't we iron our clothes? And why are we always wearing t-shirts and flip flops (eg dressed down)? [Backpacks are a problem, but fannybacks are stylish here?...hmmmm...]
- I spent the evening vegging in front of the TV. Haven't done that in awhile. Saw some TV show, My Wife and Kids, I think it was called, that seems to be the modern day Cosby Show. Only better. I even watched half an hour of a National Geographic show about polar bears. I love watching animal shows; there was an especially cute, flurry baby bird. Oh! and just now there was a Yale basketball recruiter on Boston Public! I love references to Yale and Iowa. For God, for country, and for Yaaaaaaallllllllllleeeeeeeeeee!
- I called my brother's friend's mom for advice about My Future this morning. I would love to work for all the organizations she has (refugee field). The main questions I had were 1) is law school necessary? 2) how does a master's compare? 3) suggestions for paid work/internships? Basically, I was hoping for a job offer. It didn't happen--though I'm still holding my breath she'll think of me if any come her way. The whole law degree vs. master's debate didn't get answered--it depends on what I want. Wish I knew.
- I had my first French manicure for the wedding. And I wore earrings--dangly ones, even--for the first time in years. I'm surprised I could still get them in. I felt...so girly. Yesterday I bought some simple silver studs and have been wearing them. It feels so...girly. I figured I'd give it a go, what with my hair actually getting long (by my standards).